I play World of Warcraft known as WoW among it's 10+ million strong player base. My druid has existed since a week or so after release in 2004 and, since then, I've expanded my stable of characters with a shaman (who I love), a warlock (it's fun to blow others up....), and a lonely death knight, who like Rodney Dangerfield, just can't seem to get any respect.
Anyone who knows anything about WoW knows that players work together to accomplish big goals, namely slaying not-necessarily big, scary, or slimy bad guys who hit hard and drop shiny suits of armor upon their deaths. A group of players who gather together under one name is called a guild.
Starting with that druid (nope, won't tell you the name or server...don't like stalkers. I'm weird like that), I've been in a lot of guilds and, with rare exceptions, my time ended not because of something I did, but because like The Dude (see? movie reference...), I could not abide by the egos and drama that permeated every inch of the experience. But, here's the thing: I'm patient. Exceedingly so. I try to make things work even when it's apparent I should run away for my own sanity. So usually I stick it out and eventually find myself homeless.
Guilds, like any organization, company or community group, breed a certain level of dysfunction. Type "group dynamics and dysfunction" into Google and you'll get back a hornet's nest of papers yelling about how, essentially, we humans don't really work or play well together. The thing about a game like WoW is there's another layer--anonymity.
As anyone who has used the Internet knows, the ass-hat in some bubbles to the surface the minute they plop themselves down in front of a computer screen. This behavior even has a name: "online dis-inhibition effect." Basically, people forget social norms and, either consciously or subconsciously, decide real world rules don't apply to the Internet even though the people they're interacting with virtually are real, flesh-and-blood humans they would never treat so poorly if they were standing in front of them.
For me this all relates to WoW in a very real way. I've been lied to, ditched, gossiped about, and--in one distinct act of wonderfulness--had a picture of real-life me taken down from a guild website and used to make fun. It all started when I defended the raid leader and used a big word to do so. Apparently real English scared the guy and the only thing he could think to do was pull the photo and make fun of my abundant (fill-in-the-blank). Seriously. I'm guessing mom's basement, too.
This all leads me to my current predicament, which is no one's problem but my own, but this is my blog so I can write what I want. Ah, the Internet. You cruel mistress.
So I'm guild-less. It all started six or so months ago when the guild I had been in for over two years fell apart. The guild leadership gave us a speech one day about how they had no time to raid regularly (fine, thanks for the update) but we would still be setting stuff up as a guild from time-to-time. Needless to say, they disappeared. No further word. People started leaving in exodus. Friendships we had formed either didn't matter or deteriorated in the name of those virtual shiny suits of armor.
I eventually gave up the ghost and moved on only to find that "online dis-inhibition effect" is alive and well all over the WoW-verse. I can handle the random people, those I group with once and never see again, but the guilds I joined were worse. From being simply unfriendly to downright intolerable, my guild experiences have been miserable.
You wanna know the root of the problem? It boils down to good ol' fashioned communication. In this day-and-age as we have more and more ways to stay in touch, we've fallen out of touch. We don't know how to talk to one another anymore. I've found guild leaders who have my in-game character names, email, IM address, and phone number and still can't manage to drop me a line to let me know what's going on when they know I have a question or concern. Say 'Hi' during a random dungeon and most don't respond, while others are so shocked someone is actually talking that it takes them a second to fumble a reply. People are openly rude or vulgar when something doesn't meet their liking because, you know, being civil takes too much energy. Guilds will often communicate with a core group, but ignore the needs/questions of the many. And all this bad behavior is for what? The aforementioned virtual, shiny suits of armor. Basically, crap that just don't matter.
To be sure, Wow is a microcosm of a wider problem. We've lost the ability for reasonable, intelligent conversation. All anyone has to do is turn on the evening news and see health-care legislation opponents and proponents yelling at one another with bad facts and language that would make my mother blush. Maybe it is the Internet's fault. I'm not saying we were once a wholly rational people, but it seems at one point spirited, informed debate was preferred over flaming the opposition. Between our Blackberries, iPhones, multiple email addresses, IM accounts, blogs that cater to any opinion, 24-hour news sites that give little real news, Twitter, Facebook, and lord knows what else, we seem to think communication is supposed to be a few snippets of info that solely focuses on the individual. I would argue (and I am!) that these devices and ways of "communicating" have made us more self-centered (and we really were, as a species, doing pretty well in this regard) and less capable of empathy. We don't realize that the people behind those devices are actual people, or at least we're less aware of it, in the pursuit of whatever the variant in our lives is of "virtual, shiny suits of armor." I don't know, I'm thinking the "prize" of human compassion, understanding, and intellectual curiosity is more appealing.
So, yeah, I'm guild-less, but the experience has been a fascinating, albeit frustrating, one. It has made the "shiny suits of armor" in all areas of my life seem less appealing. Made me even more aware of the real people who play the game and who exist in the world who don't seem to realize that the universe, shockingly, doesn't revolve around them. While I'm more cynical, I don't know if that's a bad thing. I mean, for one, I've always been pretty cynical, but it certainly puts things into perspective. Short term gain doesn't mean much if you leave your dignity at the door and are so apathetic to the human condition that posting on Facebook about what you had for lunch is more important than exploring the world outside your own comfortable sphere. We're a fast food, celebrity-driven culture ignorant to current events and real facts beyond sound bites and suffer a proclivity to look down on people who are thoughtful. I'm not saying that's everyone or even a majority, but it's certainly the message our media and we as a people are fostering.
What does it all mean? This post started about me talking about WoW and has come to waxing on about the human condition and attitudes in 2010. For me, this awareness means that I am loathe to ever choose "shiny suits of armor" in any facet of my life if it means stepping over someone else. It means making an effort to communicate as succinctly as possible and never letting "I" become more important than whatever community I find myself in. I will also always feed my intellectual hunger, never allowing myself to starve on ignorance and hate because it happens to fit into my goals.
The irony is the paragraph above, in this new world, would probably seem arrogant to some. We have been taught to believe that we have to take care of ourselves first and any deviation on that (even if it's just education for education's sake) is bad and counterproductive. Excuse my French, but that's bullshit. We are tribal; this as-of-late focus on complete self-interest and whatever our "shiny suit of armor" is will do one thing: cause us as a people to wither on the vine.
So, make a pledge to be nice to someone today. And while you're at it, readjust what "nice" means. It doesn't mean anything material. Give a smile. Instead of sending that email; walk over to your co-workers desk. Don't Facebook about your evening plans; invite your friends along. Don't buy into a point of view because someone told you to; find out what's going on for yourself. We can be a better people, but it starts with being a better person.
Ok, I'm off to see Shutter Island and Hot Tub Time Machine. Reviews coming soon!
